The Honker Haikus

Sliced, stuffed, and roasted — You cut into my skin with your wild attack knife, even using my own words to do it, twisting them for your own manipulative purpose. Then you played the victim when you were called out on it, steam-frying whatever you could get your hands on to create a hot suffocating…

Crawling on all fours for some Smillew coins — After being burned all month by dropping reading rates and sagging middle-aged stats, I couldn’t help but perk up when Smillew dangled some Smillew Coins with his wildly inspirational call to throw something — anything — at his Pub wall. Excellent marketer that he is, Smillew threw the phrase “last…

On the eve of war — It’s September and I’m sitting outside Buchanon’s cafe on the corner of Broadway and Pennsylvania along the scorching dry foothills somewhere in Colorado. Coffee here is hot, bitter, black as the asphalt. It’s noon and the sun is high in the sky and hot. The traffic on the street only…

A poem on ripening — Working-class parents have a way of looking down on counseling, like it’s a luxury, for the birds, an indulgence for the rich. My parents divorced like it was a car crash, and then remarried like a couple of train wrecks. And that’s an understatement. One married a billboard. And the other…

Tyrant’s last tanties — Fresh after today’s revelations from Cassidy Hutchinson’s January 6 testimony, I have summed up the news in 7 tidy Haiku soundbites. Delusional Don Lunging for the Limo wheel– Tyrant’s last tanty My White House, My toy, my country, my decision– Donald J Stalin Hang placid Mike Pence He won’t mind, VP…

The lies we tell ourselves — Abraham would be going through with his sacrifice of Isaac this time. get the wood, and follow me, son. no intervening Angel would he be taking advice from this time. the gash was made, the pattern set, like a scar — a marking and pattern to be repeated and repeated in a…

Trust me, it’s hot — If you’re looking to invest you’ve come to the right place. I’ve got hot tips and big promises, Everything here is looking up Economy is booming Smillew, that self-congratulatory “cognitive marketer” has been boasting of his record-breaking Ko-fi profits again, driven by his hot new idea of 25% back guaranteed in Smillew coins for…

Clouds of indecision — Ambiguity, that fog, pall, smog cloud, drifting over my city of thoughts like some fat procrastinating cat waiting to be fed some piece of deep fried conviction so as to act decisively, in one definite direction, one straight line of success, only to realize it’s a ball of yarn some sarcastic sadistic puppet-master pet-owner…